So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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