Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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