Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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