Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
