yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
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