she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I booty called her while she was in labor.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
