I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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