Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
