according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize