I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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