i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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