I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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