My friends, they love my intelligence
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
