i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I FOUND THE LEGS
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize