I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Randomize