i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize