I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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