His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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