You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
