Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Randomize