im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
this will be a night to untag.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
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