Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Randomize
