I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
