its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Randomize
