hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
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