my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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