): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
