Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
