i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Randomize
