fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
