So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize