her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
