is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize
