about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
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