my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
