Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
