Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize