if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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