I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
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