When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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