after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize
