You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
