you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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