I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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