White coat. Heels.
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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