Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
