More tranny stories later!
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize