when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
