Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I intend to get homeless drunk
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
