Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize
